Dog On Wheels
When I was a boy I was confounded by you
Now I'm still a boy I am indebted to you
Every song I ever wrote was written for you
Written for you
Now I'm feeling flat you seem mile away
I'm so tired that down on the pavement I'll lay
Till the blossom on the tree comes falling on me
Fall on me
From my window I can see the mountains
in snow
From my window I will shut my eyes and let go
Promise me you'll always be around when I call
And when I fall
On the river bridge up on the wall, looking
down
On the river bridge, to me a vision was shown
If I could hold on to things till I was full grown
Peace would I know
To my dog on wheels I'll tell my pleasures
and woes
To my dog on wheels I'll tell my secrets and more
Then one day in spring I'll take him down to the road
Anything goes
The State I Am In
I was surprised, I was happy for a day
in 1975
I was puzzled by a dream, stayed with me all day in 1995
My brother had confessed that he was gay
It took the heat off me for a while
He stood up with a sailor friend
Made it known upon my sisters wedding day
I got married in a rush to save a kid from being deported
Now she's in love
I was so touched, I was moved to kick the crutches
From my crippled friend
She was not impressed that I cured her on the Sabbath
So I went to confess
When she saw the funny side, we introduced my child bride
To whisky and gin
The priest in the booth had a photographic
memory
For all he had heard
He took all of my sins and he wrote a pocket novel called
"The State I Am In"
So I gave myself to God
There was a pregnant pause before he said ok
Now I spend my day turning tables round In Marks &
Spencer's
They don't seem to mind
I gave myself to sin
And I've been there and back again
I gave myself to Providence
The state that I am in
Oh love of mine, would you condescend to
help me
I am stupid and blind
Desperation is the Devil's work, it is the folly of a
boys empty mind
Now I'm feeling dangerous, riding on city buses for a
hobby is sad
Lead me to a living end
I promised that I'd entertain my crippled friend
My crippled friend
String Bean Jean
I got my fingers dirty at the school of
rock
Yeah I got my fingers dirty so I took a walk
I went up to the country park and hung around till after
dark
Till the girls got home
Till the girls got home
Did I tell you 'bout the one I know, she's
on the rag
She spent the summer day inside her sleeping bag
Yeah she spent the summer day inside until it's time to
work
And she works all night
Cause the girl's all right
The girls have got a house that's like
a caravan
And it's like your holidays whenever you go round
And we always have a laugh and then we all get in the
bath
To save on the leccy bill
Me & Jo & Phil'
I had to leave them in the morning
I left the keys around the way
I had to catch a bus
I had to leave them in the morning
I left the keys down in the caf'
I had to go to work
And when Jo was short of cash I had to
give her some
But I didn't really mind cause I was fit for once
So she paid the leccy bill and got the shopping and she
still had
Some for the cinema
So we all went out
She asked me "Do I need to lose a
bit of weight?"
And I told her "Don't be stupid 'cause you're looking
great"
And I call her String Bean Jean because the label on her
jeans says
Seven to eight years old - well that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old - that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old - that's pretty small
Seven to eight years old
Belle and Sebastian
I left the school I left my job
You saw me looking like a slob
When I was young you were the only fun in town
Everyone thought it was a shame
For Belle and the boy Sebastian
Belle was ok but oh Sebastian
Went too far again
Crashed his car in the rain
He wants to love and he wants to care
But when the boys are queuing up to tell her she's a star
Poor Sebastian is heading for a fall
Everyone thought it was a shame
For Belle and the boy Sebastian
Everyone thought it was a shame
Belle was ok but oh Sebastian
Went too far again
Crashed his car in the rain
Oh Sebastian wrote his diary that
He would never be young again
But you will
Fellow, you are ill
You'd better take a weight off of your mind and listen
To what other people say
Cause things are going wrong your own way
Lazy Line Painter Jane
Working the village shop
Putting a poster up
Dreaming of anything
Dreaming of the time when you are free from all the trouble
you're in
In the mud, on your knees
Trying hard not to please
Anyone, all the time
Being a rebel's fine
But you go all the way to being brutal
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
On the first bus out of town
On the first bus out of town
Let's see your kit for games
All the girls look the same
You are challenging style for running miles
You're running miles in some boys jumper
Boo to the business world!
You know a girl who's tax free on her back and making
Plenty cash
While you are working for the joy of giving
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
You will have a boy tonight
Or maybe you will have a girl tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
You are in two minds
Tossing a coin to decide whether you should tell your
mum
About a dose of thrush you got while you were licking
railings
But you read in a book
That you got free in Boots
There are lotions, there are potions
You can take to hide your shame from all those prying
eyes
Lazy Jane, all the time
Painting lines
You are sleeping at bus stops
Wondering how you got your name
And what you're going to do about it
You will have a boy tonight
You will have a boy tonight
And you hope that she will see
And you hope that she will see
You Made Me Forget My Dreams
You made me forget my dreams
When I woke up to you sleeping
We had peace for a night at least
But the trouble starts today
This morning you'll say
"I'll see you sometime, maybe" and I
Fall back to uneasy sleep
You made me forget my dreams
I was building a space rocket
With the boy who played bass guitar
With the boy who's wearing flares
He didn't care
He lit the fuse and ran for a mile
The space rocket went up in style
The space rocket went up in style
I'll lend you two hundred quid
For a flight across the ocean
Maybe things will look better there
Because they couldn't be much worse
Than tears and a curse
For men with guns, maturing in age
Will always pay a shitty wage
They'll always pay a shitty wage
You made me forget my dreams
When I woke up to you sleeping
There was blood on the sheets again
And the view outside the window
Of gardens in bloom
Obscured by all the trouble we had
I think I better make a move
I think I better make a move
A Century of Elvis
We were sitting in the living room on the
sofa, the wrong way round, looking out the window. It
was quiet, and then in the car park across the road we
saw Elvis - look, there beside the postman's van, and
he was walking round the postman's van, looking in the
open door. He looked as if he was thinking about getting
in, but then the postman came back, and he swaggered off,
walked past the window and down the stairs, and then at
the bottom of the stairs right by the caretaker's office,
he started licking the pavement. Every night now since
we moved in that new house there's this noise outside
the door at just about half seven or eight o' clock every
night. And if we go and look outside the door, Elvis'll
be standing there waiting to be let in. And then he wanders
into the living room, maybe sits down on one of the chairs
or even lies down on the floor. He doesn't say much, he
just stays there for an hour or two, watching the TV.
We talk to him a bit, and then around ten o' clock, he'll
go away again, and not come back until the next night.
There's a lot of lanes and stuff around here, around the
house - although it's right in the middle of the city
it seems quite like the country, it's dead hidden - safe
I suppose, made for night living. There's a lot of squirrels
and birds, and Stuart says he's seen about nine foxes
there when he's jumped over the fence on his way to Prior's
Road. Sometimes you can go out walking, and when you've
been out for a wee while even you don't know where you
are anymore, so it would be pretty hard for anyone else
to find you. I suppose that's why he spends so much time
there, that's why he's come to live there, or maybe it's
just the squirrels. I read about somewhere that he likes
squirrels quite a lot. There's these two videos that we
got for wedding presents - called the e-files, e-files
one and e-files two about how Elvis is supposed to be
still alive. And one time when he came round we were watching
one of those, but he didn't say anything he just sat on
the armchair. He was playing with his collar a bit, and
we watched it right through and then when it finished
he just got up and walked off into the mist and didn't
say anything. the first few times he came round I didn't
speak to him at all, I wasn't really sure what to say.
And Karen spoke to him quite a lot - she seemed to know
what to do more than I do. He had quite a strange manner
though, he'd go into your stuff and look through it, then
he'd maybe pick something up and play with it for a wee
while, but he'd never make any comment about any of it.
Seemed pretty rude to me. I just watched whatever Karen
did, and listened to how she talked to him and then, after
a while I started to copy that, and tell him a few things,
not really bothered about whether he responded or said
anything back or not. I think the first time I spoke to
him we were sitting up on the mezzanine and I said that
I would tell him about me and wee Karen, and how it was
that we'd come to be living there. I thought he probably
liked the fact that we were living there because he came
round so much, so I thought he might want to know how
it was that it came about. We did it all over backwards,
I told him. First of all we got to know each other, and
then a while after that we met, and when we'd known each
other for about seven years we decided to have an anniversary,
and that went quite well, so after the anniversary we
had a honeymoon, and that went well too, so after that
we decided that we would get married. That's why we're
living there now. I used to think my dad was Elvis, but
I haven't told him that yet. I haven't told my dad either...
Photo Jenny
I'm in a mess, I'm in a dress
There's nothing from here till tomorrow morning
How will I get there?
I don't do drugs
All my friends are on their holidays
I go outside, it's not so bad
I saw my friend and he couldn't believe that
The girls were holding hands
The girls are holding hands
Don't be a fool
It's 1995, the girls are just friends
They got the drugs I could use but then
I don't need any
All that I want is a photograph of Photo Jenny
How will I get one? I don't know
How will I get one? I don't know
How will I get her to strike a pose?
It's getting cold, I'll catch the bus
I saw my friend when she's finished working
Get some fish and chips
What's on the box?
'Man about the house' with Paula Wilcox
You see the boy/girl's at the bar
Everyone thinks she's really ugly
But I shut my eyes
And the star of it is Photo Jenny
A Century Of Fakers
There are people going hungry every day
They've got nothing on their plates
And you're filling your fat face with every different
kind of cake
And if you ever go lardy, or go lame
I will drop you straight away
That's the price you have to pay
For every stupid thing you say
There are people going lonely, and they'll
stay
Lonely fay into the year
Because you're making blinkers fashionable
And fashionably you'll say
"All is equal in love and war" and
"I'm sorry, but I've got some things to do"
And you pretend to read a book you'll never finish till
the day
That the author dedicates it
To A Century Of Fakers
They took your mould and they burned it on the fire in
history today
Yeah, the author dedicates it
To A Century Of Fakers
He was an anarchist, he tried his best but it wasn't good
enough
Did I say I would see you soon?
Well I'm sorry, but i just came off my bike
And my face is scarred
And chance has barred me seeing you tonight
I was over the other side of the city
And if the truth be known I'd say
That you look great from there before you shaved your
golden hair today
Everybody's trying to make us
Another century of fakers
They took you mould and burned it on the fire of history
today
Everybody's trying to make us
Another cool decade of fakers
Another century of fakers
Le Pastie De La Bourgeoisie
Sunbeam shone, mousy girl on the end pew
You'd stay home, oh if only they let you
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
Municipal pool, you're a junior life saver
But you're friends are all serious ravers
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
Reading Judy Blume
But you came too soon
You're too tall, much too tall for a boyfriend
They run and hide, from your buck tooth and split ends
Don't be scared, like the books you've read
You're the heroine
You'll be doing fine
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Bestowing the memory of good and evil
On the ones you left behind
The heartless swine
And you love like nobody around you
How you love, and a halo surrounds you
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
In the Autumn cool
Say cheerio to school
Listen Dear, I've been watching you lately
If I said all these things you would hate me
Le Pastie de la Bourgeoisie
At the church bazaar
I nearly went too far
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Give yourself up to the allure of
Catcher In The Rye
The future's swathed in Stars and Stripes
Wouldn't you like to get away?
Kerouac's beckoning with open arms,
And open roads of eucalyptus
Westward bound
Beautiful
She lay in bed all night watching the morning
change
She lay in bed all night watching the colours change
She lay in bed all night watching the colours change into
green and gold
The doctor told her years ago that she
was ill
The doctor told her years ago to take a pill
The doctor told her years ago that she'd go blind if she
wasn't careful
They let Lisa go blind
The world was at her feet and she was looking down
They let Lisa go blind
But everyone she knew thought she was beautiful
Only slightly mental
Beautiful, a bit temperamental
Beautiful, only slightly mental
Beautiful
She thought it would be fun to try photography
She thought it would be fun to try pornography
She thought it would be fun to try most anything
She was tired of sleeping
They let Lisa go blind, let Lisa go blind,
let Lisa go blind
They let Lisa go blind
She's looking like a queen
But if you knew what's going on in her life
There'd be a thousand barren mothers there to talk to
her
If you knew what's going on in her life
There'd be two hundred troubled teenagers to sit with
her
And to talk to her
If you knew what's going on in her life
What's going on in her life
What's going on in her life
There would be a documentary on Radio 4
She made herself a pair of orthopaedic
shoes
She thought it was the answer to the fashion blues
She mad herself a pair of orthopaedic shoes
But she walked with a limp
Put The Book Back On The Shelf
Sebastian you're in a mess
You had a dream, they called you king
Of all the hipsters, is it true?
Or are you still the queen?
Like getting blood out of a stone
The city left you all alone
You came to dance, but there's no poignancy
When they all leave you standing alone
The wider issues of the day
Don't interest you, you'll have to pay
For looking at the floor
When people talk to you
You wrote a book about yourself
The people left it on the shelf
You'll write another one
Now you've got a story that's worth talking about
Are you happy with yourself?
Are you talking to yourself?
Are you happy with yourself?
Put the book back on the shelf
I know the company you keep
You're on the sofa hidden deep
While on the telly Sid James speaks
To you like God
You're always looking for a sign
But boy you blow it every time
You hear a voice begin to speak
You ignore it and go softly to sleep
This Is Just a Modern Rock Song
Emma tried to run away,
I followed her across the city,
She went out to the Easterhouse,
Because she liked the sound of it.
She didn't have a single penny,
She stuck a finger in the air,
She tried to flag down an aeroplane,
I suppose she needs a holiday.
I put my arm around her waist,
She put me on the ground with Judo,
She didn't recognise my face,
She wasn't even looking.
Laura's feeling just ideal,
Her horoscope was nearly perfect,
She's thinking of something to do,
Because she is The Birthday Girl.
She walked out to the edge of town,
She saw me lying in the park,
She took Emma by the hand,
They've got a lot in common.
I'll leave them to do what they want,
I'll leave them to do what they need to,
I'll go and play with words and pictures,
I'll admit I'm feeling strange.
[instrumental]
I'm not as sad as Doestoevsky,
I'm not as clever as Mark Twain,
I'll only buy a book for the way it looks,
And then I stick it on the shelf again.
Now I could tell you what I'm thinking,
But it never seems to do you good,
It's beyond me what a girl can see,
I'm only lucid when I'm writing songs.
This is just a modern rock song,
This is just a sorry lament,
We're four boys in corduroys,
We're not terrific but we're competent.
Stevie's full of good intentions,
Richards into rock 'n' roll,
Stuart's staying in and he thinks it's a sin,
That he has to leave the house at all.
[instrumental]
This is just a modern rock song,
This is just a tender affair,
I count "three, four" and then we start to slow,
Because a song has got to stop somewhere
I Know Where The Summer Goes
I know where the summer goes
When you're having no fun
When you're under the thumb
I know where the summer dwells
If your underarm smells
And your kitchen looks like hell
I know where the summer goes
If you're scraping a pot, and your head is hot
Put your head down, put your thumbs up girl
With the smell of hot desk
And the glitter of your step
He was right, he's the upcoming guru of the city
No one told the city councillors
I know, you can tell me again
I've got my mobile phone
Full of silicon chips
No one likes a smart arse
But I've seen a pattern emerge
I will race you up the hill
Where the boy who made records out of postcard messages
And flowering cherries rain on kids like you
Look twice at the kid with the crimped
And overheated hair
They ran a book on his looks
Odds on was the noble pose and
The denim hard riff of the Irish Troubadour
But the boy came from nowhere to
Steal the hearts of lassies in the lavvies of the club
tonight
The Gate
In the hope I'll forget I'll wait
It's a chance I'll take oh yeah
In the hope I'll forget I'll wait
For the time
In the spring I'll watch my step
While the night-time passes by
When a smile suits me all alone
I'll be fine
There's got to be a better song to sing
Before I hang upon your shoulder
Telling the truth it may be bolder this time
There's got to be a better song to sing
That makes a lonely one less cold oh
Before I hang upon your shoulder and cry
Watching friends playing in the dirt
Feeling hard but feeling hurt
By the sadness that wastes my time
It's a crime
Counting acts which I must add
To collect sad memories
From a past I'd soon forget
Swap or leave
There's got to be a better song to sing
Before I hang upon your shoulder
Telling the truth it may be bolder this time
There's got to be a better song to sing
That makes a lonely one less cold oh
Before I hang upon your shoulder and cry
At the gate I'll wave goodbye
To the friends that were my lies
And I'll see them off at dawn
Feeling wise
Feeling wise
Feeling wise
Slow Graffiti
There's a portrait
In a back room,
Which I keep for days upon, which I relent
And gaze for hours on the muscle skin and bone of some
Imaginary friend.
So how about it?
Show me please how I will look in twenty years
And let me please,
Interpret history in every line and scar that's painted
There in front of me.
It doesn't matter what I'm thinking
What I tell myself to do
I'll end up calling.
I stay in to defrost the fridge
Now the kid has gone to bed
A feeling of dread.
At least when she's around the troubles there,
It's worse to wake up with her falling round the room.
Listen Johnny; you're like a mother
To the girl you've fallen for,
And you're still falling.
Listen Johnny;
You're like a mother to the girl you've fallen for,
And you're still falling,
And if they come tonight
You'll roll up tight and take whatever's coming to you
next
Legal Man
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming
back
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming back
Refer to our discussions, confirm the terms of our love
affair
I exercise all options, and I know I'll see you there
BA-BA-BA etc. etc.
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming
back
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming back
Not withstanding provisions of clauses
1,2,3 and 4
Extend contractual period, me and you for evermore
You're the Legal Man, you've got to prove
that you're no liar
I'll render services that you may reasonably require
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming
back
L-O-V-E love, it's coming back, it's coming back
Get out of the city and into the sunshine
Get out of the office and into the springtime
Get out of the city and into the sunshine
Get out of the office and into the springtime
Get out of the city and into the sunshine
Get out of the office and into the springtime
Get out of the city and into the sunshine
Get out of the office and into the springtime
Judy Is A Dick Slap
[Instrumental]
Winter Wooskie
[Instrumental]
Jonathan David
I know you like her
Well I like her too
I know she likes you
It's not as if I'm being sent off to War
There are worse things in this world
There's still room on my wooden horse for two
I was Jonathan to your David
You're still King
Well, I'd thought about her
I dreamed she'd come, I'd make my escape
I thought she liked me but somehow I was wrong
I know you don't want it this way
But it's O.K.
It's not like we'll be parted
It's not like we never know love
And she'll smile for you
She'll hold your hand
You'll be in love there's no other way
And I will make it some day
I know you like her
Well I like her too
I know she likes you
It's not as if I'm being sent off to War
There are worse things in this world
There's still room on my wooden horse for
two
I was Jonathan to your David
You're still King
Visions of love recollected
Have we ever been true?
I know that I have, it's time for you to go
It's all in the stones that you throw
I want you to know
It's not like we'll be parted
It's not like we never know love
And she'll smile for you
She'll hold your hand
You'll be in love there's no other way
People say that
"We'll never change"
"We'll never change"
But I have
You and her in the local newspaper
You will be Married and you'll be gone
Married and you'll be gone
Take Your Carriage Clock And Shove
It
In the board room the quiet man takes a
Second to think what to do
He's out of his seat and he's starting to speak
And he hears his own voice
For years and years he's done nothing but bow down and
put up with all their demands
She sits like a viper and offers the clock
Without giving a damn
He takes it
"Honour forbids me but honour be damned
You have whined till you got what you want
I did the work and when things were going badly
You left us to rot"
He locked the door or the boardroom
And turned like the scene from the old country song
Towering over the table he's lost
He is drunk with it all
"You only
Came back to us when we'd turned it around
When we'd rescued your arse from the fire
Your contribution to all that we did was to say
it was dire"
"Night after day after night I've
been working
Despite of you fucking us all
Now I'm going to die I don't care if you cry
Just please leave me alone
And spare your tears from yourself
We've had those till we're sick
You should leave while you still have the chance"
The others were shocked at this shameless
disgrace
At the end of an honoured career
He paused in the silence to pull down his tie
And observe the melee
The Loneliness Of a Middle Distance
Runner
[Instrumental]
I'm Waking Up To Us
I need someone to take some joy in something
I do
You need a man who's either rich or losing a screw
You know I love you here's the irony
You're going to walk away intact
I think you never liked me anyway
You like yourself and you like
Men to kiss your arse
Expensive clothes
Please stop me there
I think I'm waking up to us
We're a disaster
You don't want to know me
'Cause you move in circles of the brave
Where art defines their lives
She was the one love of my life, and I let her go
And if I look like death today
then please let her know
I never wanted to do harm to her
I only wanted her to see
The beauty of the world surrounding her
But when she opened up her eyes
It's much too late
Our chance has gone
She's with a guy
Who takes the prize for everything I ever showed her
Digging all the fun
Because she's older
I fed her with a spoon
I made her mother smile
I helped the kid survive
She was the one love of my life,
she showed me the road
I loved her dog, her steady gaze, the chapter is closed
I always wanted all the best for her
The best thing was to stay away
She grew up and she left the rest of us
And now the understanding's gone
I haven't changed, how could I?
I'm pretty much the same person
I cannot keep the anger hidden anymore
But lucky for you, you are not around
My anger turns to pity and to love
The season has arrived
I Love My Car
I love my car
I'll admit today I've gone too far
To enamour myself of my little motor car
I love my dog
I love my pussy cat, I love the rat
That lives under the floor and makes his bed from novelettes
I wish I could say the same for you
The day will come soon when I look in your eyes but
I won't see you
I've got a head like a soaking sponge
I've got a tongue like a little slug
I won't be bugged by trivia
I love my Carl
I love my Brian my Dennis and my Al
I could even find it in my heart to love Mike Love
I wish I could say the same for you
The day will come soon when I look in your eyes to
see you smiling
Marx and Engels
There's misery in all I hear and see
From the people on TV
After their tea when life begins again
They'll be happier than me
There are a thousand meals being made on Saturday
From the view I saw today
I took a bet inside the launderette
With a girl from Wallasey
She spoke in dialect I could not understand
But one thing she made clear
There was no coming on to her
There was no way
There's misery in all I hear and see
From the people on TV
After their tea when life begins again
They'll be happier than me
There are a thousand meals being made on
Saturday
From the view I saw today
I took a bet inside the launderette
With a girl from Wallasey
She spoke in dialect I could not understand
But one thing she made clear
There was no coming on to her
There was no way
That she could respect
If it couldn't see
That the girl just wants to be
Left alone with Marx and Engels for a while
She's writing in the style
Of any riot girl
"The bourgeoisie, historically,
has played a revolutionary part to all feudal, idyllic
relationships.
It has resolved personal worth and in place of freedom
is exploitation for profit alone.
There is a spectre of the past in my bold assertion.
We could learn much from the past
